We Are Not Created Equal
People are all individuals, and therefore, no two people are ever the same. Although we may have similarities, we are all very unique and different from one another.
Good teachers must be able to act differently with different students. People are not all the same, therefore, their personalities are not the same. Their problems, abilities, strengths, and interpretations of the art will all be different. Students are not only different on a physical level, but also different on emotional and mental levels as well. The teacher may be harder on students who have thicker skin, but the same harsh manner would only crush and discourage a more sensitive student. The goal is to be able to communicate effectively to help all types of students grow to their highest potential.
People are all human, but very different from each other, and therefore, their approach to their Kung Fu practice is very different. Different students may want a great workout, self-defense, or stress management, but the one thing that all have in common is that they have their own desires, and fulfilling that desire is not the only thing that Kung Fu has to offer. Over time, every student discovers that they are really getting more out of Kung Fu practice than they ever thought they would. They may have come in for one thing, but they never imagined there would be other benefits they'd be acquiring as well. Most of the time, these other benefits have a greater impact than the ones they originally sought. Through practice, they learn more about themselves and how to interact with others; moreso than any other activity they could find themselves involved with.
Not only are people individually different, but the longer they train, they more they grow as seniors, and therefore, their relationship with the Sifu begins to change. There is an invisible line between the student and the Sifu. The Sifu can and will cross over, back and forth on both sides of the line freely, but a student should never take that as an invitation to step over the line. The Sifu is both a teacher and a student (for s/he continues to learn daily), but the student is only a student and must train diligently daily to become the best student s/he can become. When the student crosses the line, they have not hurt the Sifu, but instead have hurt their ability to be a student. If the student gets too friendly and feels the Sifu is his/her easily-approachable buddy, the student will start to treat the Sifu too casually. This disregard for the Sifu only hurts the student. The student needs to keep a certain amount of seriousness, respect, and reverence, both for the practice and for the Sifu. After all, the Sifu is the person who is going to help the student reach his/her highest potential through the practice of Kung Fu. The Sifu should not be someone the student merely hangs out with, in any shape or form. The greatest compliment a student can receive from a Sifu is: "No matter how hard the practice is or how relaxed we are, you always remember to treat me with the utmost respect and never forget you are a student."
This is something that most Westerners have a very hard time doing, because they do not understand the true relationship between a teacher and a student. There is nothing like it here in the West, so they have a difficult time grasping this concept, especially if they never had an example to follow.
Most people approach martial arts because they want some exercise, self-defense, to get in better shape, to gain some confidence, or simply because it gives them something to do and is a place to meet people. Nonetheless, when they first enter the environment, it is foreign to them, and as they continue to practice, they find themselves getting way more than they ever imagined.
It is very difficult for the student to cultivate the correct relationship with their Sifu, but it is to the student's benefit to develop and cultivate this relationship. It is the student who is extremely fortunate to find a Sifu who has a clear enough understanding, a deep enough perspective, and a willingness to share this deeply passionate part of their life with the student. The student should hold this relationship in the highest regard possible.
As a Kung Fu student, it is important for you to set the tone for all new people coming in to follow. This way, they have an example to follow as they start to develop and cultivate the same mindset for their Sifu and their Kung Fu practice. There is a saying, "the environment is stronger than the will." Therefore, if the senior students set the tone of the school's environment, then all of the students will gain as much as they can from practicing in this type of environment.
Becoming a leader, you must always remember the goal: "To gain as much as you can from the practice and to grow and develop to the best of your ability." This can only be accomplished by cultivating the necessary relationship with your Sifu.